"Guards! Guards" from Terry Pratchett by ETU

Cry out for the city watch and English Theatre Utrecht will come!

What would you do for a better city? One of the city’s many cults has the answer: summon a dragon! After all, if there’s a dragon, there's a king just around the corner to slay it; all the best prophecies say so! And if you can control a dragon, you can control whatever schmuck you can find to slay it.

Carrot, a fresh faced recruit, has travelled to Ankh Morpork after learning he is not a dwarf but merely raised by dwarves. Now he has to contend with his barely-passing-as-human coworkers who can barely decide what drink to order at the pub, let alone solve the string of arsons and dragon shaped footprints that are springing up around the city.